She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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