guys are only as good as the porn they watch
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
