His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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