oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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