So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
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