i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
