If that was your dad, he is hot
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
