Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Randomize
