Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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