we have officially lost it.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Randomize
