Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
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