gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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