you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
