just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
