so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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