Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
