reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize