I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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