Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
