Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
