I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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