Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
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Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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