quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Randomize
