plz talk dirty to me
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
