1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
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