you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
