whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Blood and glitter go together right?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
