She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
