I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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