We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
