Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
