P.S. I can't hear my feet
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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