ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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