i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
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