I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize