Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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