hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize