It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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