he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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