I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
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On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
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It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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