Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
