i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
