4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize