Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
