Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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