I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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