the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
