My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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