I CAN MOONWALK!
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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