Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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