Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
